P.S. Sorry, should be: Line 6--"feelings around him" and "but I know" Also, "in touch with everyone else's feelings around him" is not a great way to express that thought.
Thanks for another great post! I couldn't find a lot of glaring grammatical errors, but the use of present tense and a lot of the word choices are quite awkward..."He knows the answer...I can feel the smile spreading across...". It just sounds weird. As far as grammar, here goes: Line 2--Should there be a comma before and after Kenna or just after Kenna and before but? Line 4--should it be "my big brother, Logan,"? Line 6--Should there be a comma between" feelings around him and "but I know"? Line 8--should be: "my brother and me." Line 10 should be "Are you excited, sis?" "Chin on top of my head" doesn't sound great. The author certainly wasn't being very punctilious on this piece, LOL. This one was quite the brain teaser! Have a great week.
P.S. Sorry, should be: Line 6--"feelings around him" and "but I know" Also, "in touch with everyone else's feelings around him" is not a great way to express that thought.
Thanks for another great post! I couldn't find a lot of glaring grammatical errors, but the use of present tense and a lot of the word choices are quite awkward..."He knows the answer...I can feel the smile spreading across...". It just sounds weird. As far as grammar, here goes: Line 2--Should there be a comma before and after Kenna or just after Kenna and before but? Line 4--should it be "my big brother, Logan,"? Line 6--Should there be a comma between" feelings around him and "but I know"? Line 8--should be: "my brother and me." Line 10 should be "Are you excited, sis?" "Chin on top of my head" doesn't sound great. The author certainly wasn't being very punctilious on this piece, LOL. This one was quite the brain teaser! Have a great week.